By Prof. Nassir Hussein Kahin, Executive Managing Editor
In an act of political desperation that could only be described as a cross between a tragicomedy and a con artist’s last stand, Somalia’s President Hassan Sheikh Mohamud has penned what may be the most outrageous diplomatic letter of the decade. Leaked to the media, this now-infamous missive to former U.S. President Donald Trump offers “exclusive operational control” over strategic ports—ports that, inconveniently, Somalia does not actually control.
Observers have described the letter as the political equivalent of trying to sell someone else’s house while they’re still living in it. Worse still, it reeks of the sheer panic gripping Villa Somalia as whispers grow that Trump—widely regarded as the ultimate dealmaker—might just recognize Somaliland, finally ending Mogadishu’s decades-long charade of sovereignty over its breakaway regions.
The Great Somaliland Fire Sale—Everything Must Go!
In a move that would make even the most seasoned used-car salesman blush, Hassan Sheikh boldly offered Trump “strategically positioned assets” that could provide the U.S. with “uninterrupted military and logistical access” while supposedly preventing external rivals—read: China, Turkey, and Iran—from gaining a foothold in the Horn of Africa.
The problem? The assets in question—Berbera port and airbase in Somaliland, and Bosaso port in Puntland—are about as much under Somali control as Mars is.
Somaliland declared independence in 1991 and has functioned as a stable, self-governing entity ever since. Puntland, while nominally part of Somalia, severed ties with Mogadishu in 2023 after years of bitter disputes. The idea that Somalia could “offer” these territories to the U.S. is as ridiculous as a squatter renting out the presidential palace to tourists.
Desperation Knows No Bounds
The sheer absurdity of the letter has left political analysts slack-jawed.
“Who are they to offer access?” scoffed one senior analyst who requested anonymity to avoid bursting into laughter on record. “This is like a man trying to sell the Brooklyn Bridge for the tenth time. Hassan Sheikh is insulting Trump’s intelligence and, worse, embarrassing himself on the world stage.”
Another analyst chimed in: “What’s next? Will Mogadishu offer Trump the Eiffel Tower and a free membership to an imaginary Red Sea yacht club?”
Somalia’s $600 Million Boondoggle
This diplomatic farce is the culmination of Mogadishu’s years-long campaign to sabotage Somaliland’s bid for recognition. The Somali government has reportedly spent over $600 million on powerful Washington lobbyists, disinformation campaigns, and backroom deals, all in a futile attempt to keep the U.S. and the world from acknowledging the obvious—Somaliland is independent, whether Mogadishu likes it or not.
Adding to the embarrassment, Hassan Sheikh also misled Ethiopian Prime Minister Abiy Ahmed with a bogus deal promising him access to the Red Sea—another promise he had no power to make. At this point, his political strategy seems to be “fake it till you make it,” except nobody is buying the act.
Trump, Somaliland, and the Inevitable Shift
The timing of Hassan Sheikh’s laughable offer is no coincidence. Trump’s allies have been openly discussing recognizing Somaliland, a move that would realign U.S. interests in the region away from Mogadishu’s endless instability and toward a functioning, democratic partner.
In fact, a U.S. congressional subcommittee recently called for opening a diplomatic mission in Hargeisa, signaling Washington’s growing impatience with Somalia’s dysfunction. Somaliland has already offered military access to the U.S. in exchange for recognition, and with geopolitical tensions rising, the Berbera port could be a crucial staging ground for countering Houthi aggression and monitoring China’s movements in the Red Sea.
This is what really keeps Hassan Sheikh up at night. The realization that, after three decades of stonewalling, his house of cards is about to collapse.
Final Act: A Diplomatic Self-Own for the Ages
The leaked letter to Trump is not just an act of desperation—it’s a spectacular self-own. In attempting to “out-Trump” Trump, Hassan Sheikh has instead outed himself as a political con artist trying to peddle assets he doesn’t own.
Political analyst Mohamed Mubarak summed it up best: “This is what happens when a government that barely controls its own capital starts making grand promises about territories beyond its reach. It’s like watching a magician fumble his own trick.”
With Trump’s foreign policy hawks circling and Somaliland’s recognition inching closer to reality, one thing is clear: Hassan Sheikh’s last-ditch effort may go down as the most spectacularly foolish diplomatic blunder in Somali history.
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